
5 Reasons Why I Think Valentine’s Sucks
When I was born, the Fate who was in charge with the romantic side of my character was probably out for a beer… so I got nothing on this chapter. But I still consider myself a nice person. And because I am so nice, I will share with you my true feelings about this commercial “celebration”.
1I was born in a communist country. We were told what to eat, what to sing (and when to sing it), what to wear and so on. And now, because of Valentine’s, I am being told, again, what to say. I have to say ‘’I love you”, otherwise I am an evil creature who deserves nothing in this world. I rather say f..k you, but this is another story 🙂 2This day must be the nightmare of every firemen in the world. Can you imagine how many fires start because women (or men?!) want to show love by having dinner at candle lights?!?3Scenario: We are in love. It’s Valentine’s. You want to show your love by bringing me a box of chocolate. I love chocolate so I eat it all.
Consequence: I get fat because I ate the full box of chocolate. Now I hate you because you brought me that damn chocolate that made me fat.
4I love eating out for so many reasons. I am a lousy cook , plus dinning out is a very good way to see friends, etc. But there are some days when I wish I’d know how to cook. Wanna know why? Remember the last time you tried to book a table in a good restaurant on Valentine’s? Did you call all the restaurants in town? Was “we are sorry, we are fully booked” the thing you heard every time? Ok.. now you get me. But, a couple of times I was lucky enough to find a place. So I dressed up and went to the restaurant with my friends. When we entered everybody started staring, clearly thinking: ohh, poor girls, alone on Valentine’s, they have such a miserable life. After 5 seconds women started throwing fire balls through their eyes: “Aha, you are alone and you came here to steal our men! I know your type”! Well, no ‘mam, we are just here to eat. 5And last, but not least… I feel so sorry for the poor men who forgot about this “celebration”. I am shivering everytime I hear their stories about “ you don’t love me, you couldn’t even bring a flower, of course, I am not important. Are you seeing somebody else? Yes, this is it! You are cheating on me!” and so one. Trust me, horror stories.Happy Valentine’s!! (It’s not going to be easy, I’m telling you..)
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